My readers know by now that much of the inspiration for my columns comes from the words and lessons of Torah I’ve heard from my husband, shlit”a, and my wonderful sons, sheyichyu. Today’s offering, however, would fall under the category of “everything I need to know I learned in kindergarten” since my current inspiration derives from a particularly insightful remark made by one of my many precocious grandchildren. In fact, the comment of little Yossi, the three-year-old son of my daughter Chana Malka, tichyeh, is worthy not only of chuckles but of serious reflection. Many preschools and chadarim have a system whereby children bring in “mitzvah notes” attesting to their good behavior. Charming and impish, Yossi pushes the limits at home, making the exercise of finding endorsements for his good behavior quite challenging. On this particular occasion, when his mother asked him what she should write, he replied, “Write that ‘Ich folg der mama’ (I obey my mother.) “When exactly did that happen?” she asked him accusingly. Without a moment’s hesitation, he responded, “Fun heint un in vaiter vel ich folgen” (from today and onward I will behave).” Clearly undeterred by his lapses in the past, he was poised to move on. Indeed, for him, “today” was the first day of the rest of his life, and he had no intention of being defined or judged by what had already transpired. My son, Reb Efraim, shlit”a, of Chicago, dwelled on this concept in his shiur on Parshas Kedoshim, which we read in shul on the Shabbos after Pesach. The Torah enjoins us to “be holy,” in the present tense.
This would seem to have been a tall order for a nation that was trying to make its way out of a spiritual morass unparalleled in history. How could a people who had sunk so low be exhorted to be holy? The answer, Reb Efraim explained, relates to the ongoing battle of klal Yisrael with their archenemy, Amalek. Our Sages taught that one of Moshe Rabbeinu’s essential attributes was his approach of dealing with the hereand-now. An example is found in the epic “Az Yashir,” the song of thanksgiving in which Moshe led the nation at the miraculous splitting of the sea. Moshe focused on the moment. He did not allow the anguish of the past or concerns about the future to derail him. Because this particular moment called for a triumphant song of gratitude, “az yashir”— literally, “so then he sang.” This mode of approaching situations by capitalizing on the “now” is a lesson for our people. Amalek, by contrast, represents all the detractors who attempt to undermine this significant achievement by invoking “machar,” the concept of tomorrow. The Amalekites of the world personify the demoralizing attitude that even if you win the battle today, you will not be able to sustain that victory tomorrow. Why deceive yourself, Amalek scoffs, when you know that today’s victory will be short-lived? Why even try? Based on this insight, Moshe Rabbeinu’s marching orders to Yehoshua take on new meaning: “Go out and wage war against Amalek tomorrow” is not simply a schedule for the upcoming battle but the definition of the enemy, whose stratagem is to sidetrack and deter us with the inevitable failures of tomorrow. As Jews, however, we know that it’s the “now” that counts, regardless of the challenges the future may bring.
It is only natural, especially for a nation that had just emerged from 210 years of slavery, to find a commitment to leading a disciplined life forever to be overwhelming. Moshe Rabbeinu, in his Divinely inspired wisdom, knew that a person will respond affirmatively to doing Hashem’s will now if he knows it will count, even if he can’t promise with certainty that tomorrow he will have equal success. Consider the fate of the many New Year’s resolutions for diet and exercise. How long do they last? The thought of ongoing deprivation in the former case and of painful exertion in the latter, without the prospect of relief, is too daunting a commitment for most. A more reasonable approach advocated by all therapeutic programs is to take one day at a time. My daughter Chagi told me that convincing her youngsters to give up their pacifiers for “just one day” worked wonders. Her earlier “forever” attempts had invariably met with failure. Another such case is Rachel, an acquaintance of mine who thrived on sharing the latest news (bordering on gossip) with her friends. She was viewed as the clearinghouse for the latest in marriages, divorces, additions and the acquisition of new homes. When Rachel was apprised of the serious violations she might be transgressing in disseminating such information indiscriminately, she was determined to “kick the habit.” Rachel adopted a much more disciplined approach to the information she passed on. As she later related, her success in exercising self-control was due to dealing exclusively with the situation at hand, the now. She did not promise herself that she would never again engage in prohibited talk. That, Rachel believes, would have set her up for failure.
By framing the issue in the context of the immediate present, she was able to achieve mastery; the next moment would constitute its own challenge. In this way, Rachel progressively strengthened her spiritual muscles. In the exceptional instances of a lapse, she knew that her victories stood on their own merit and that nobody could take them away from her. This motivated her and kept her going, because at the end of the day she was able to see herself as a success rather than as a failure. My grandson Yossi, young as he is, intuited correctly when he told his mother that although he hadn’t lived up to the expectations of yesterday, there was a today, and with G-d’s help, a tomorrow. Hope springs eternal where the future is concerned, but first and foremost we must invoke the policy of “az,” making the current moment triumphant. We dare not lose out on the victories we can achieve this very minute.